Monthly Archives: April 2012

You Want Better…What Are you Doing To Get It?

24 April 2012, by A. Cedilla

You want this.
You want that.
You want, waant, waaant.
What are you doing about it?

We want. In the back of our heads, even if we rarely truly pay attention, we’re always on the alert for the next shiny, the next new thing that catches our eye. Something new comes up — a bit of hot news, the next-gen incarnation of your fave whatever, the latest widget — we come closer. We dream of what we can do with it. We eye, examine, fondle. If we like it, we spin madly glittery tales about what we can do with it.
And we covet.
We waaaaaaant.

Human beings are built to have an ever-present need for stimulation, but it takes experience, training and a little bit of heartbreak –okay, more than a little bit — to get past all the bright and shinies distracting us and focus on going after what we really want and need.

Say you want things to be better in your life. Something along the lines of “My life will definitely be easier if-when I ______.” That time isn’t now, or even next week, (next month?) so…

What are you doing in the meantime?

  • You want change to happen but you’re nervous about what it will mean, and how much it will cost.
  • Big change breaks down into incremental (read: small) changes carried out in consistent actions.

Fears can prove themselves true or not with the passage of time, but you shouldn’t let fear stop you. Fear is an internal mind-game. If you let fear override you, it chips at your agency.

Examine your life and look at the decisions you’ve made, the actions you’ve taken. Do you see any trends? Are you just filling in your “in the meantime” or are you making your time count until you realize your desires?

What are these small steps you can take each day to make a difference?
Perhaps it’s just pulling away from all the soda. Or cutting down on the TV. Maybe it’s taking the stairs instead of the elevator, for two floors, just to start. Maybe it’s taking a deep breath instead of snapping back when your parent/significant other/sibling/friend opens their mouth about your ‘issues’.

Maybe it’s cutting loose a partner who’s no longer helping you progress…or just adding three more customer follow-ups than you feel you can answer each day. It’s up to you to take a good long look at your life and examine what needs shaking up. Continue reading You Want Better…What Are you Doing To Get It?

Habit: The Art of Taking Action Without Having to Overthink It

17 April 2012, by A. Cedilla

What’s a good habit to have?

It’s easy to come up a few examples. Just look at the cover of any popular magazine at the newsstand, or listen to the news…or even a few infomercials. Pay attention to what people talk about at lunch. Look at the articles you read on your favorite websites. Think of all the things you put off to start doing, you know, for later…any day now…someday real soon.

  • Weaving exercise into your day — to keep yourself as healthy as you can be for as long as you can.
  • Keeping to a budget — to make sure you don’t get into financial trouble and so you know what you have and haven’t got.
  • Recognizing and protecting your own boundaries — so you can defend yourself won’t be as stressed-out as when you let others run all over you.
  • Not keeping a record of grievances — which can keep you tied to the past and unable to move on with your life (which is stress-inducing as well.)

A habit is a pattern of behavior. Patterns are established by repetition, and they can be rerouted by repetition as well.

How do you develop a new habit?

First you think about it very much. You mull over the idea.

  • You come close and poke it with a stick and flip it over to see what nasty things may be hiding underneath.
  • You don’t want to do it. You think you have to do it.
  • You know you have to do something. You accept that you know you have to do it.
  • You try to do it. You keep trying.
  • You slip. You beat yourself up a bit, then you try again.
  • You keep doing it. You do it over and over until it sticks.

When what you want –and the feelings behind the object of your desire– rules you, you have to set your system up to remove any obstacle that you can seize as an excuse when you don’t feel like doing it, but you have to do it anyway. Don’t believe me? Continue reading Habit: The Art of Taking Action Without Having to Overthink It

Don’t Quite Know What To Do? Develop An Eye for Service

11 April 2012, by A. Cedilla

When you have a dream about making money from following your passion, sometimes the passion can get in the way of realizing the dream. So what more if you don’t know what your true passion is? What do you do?

Everyone daydreams. All of us, at one time or another, entertained vivid mental movies where we get everything we want. Dreams, daydreams, fantasies — or more specifically, visions — are important because they give us the outlines of something we want. They give us something to aspire to. They’re symbols.

They’re like bright fluttery curtains behind which are hidden our true desires and deeply held convictions, and to make our dreams come true, to real-ize our truth, we have to work at pulling back the curtain. Keyword: work.

Now, when you’ve got a number of years under your belt and gained the maturity from those years, hopefully you’ve accepted learned a few things about yourself and your many dreams.

Some dreams you outgrew, some you realized weren’t right for who you were growing into, and some were all flash and no substance — and yet the flash was so, well, flashy and pretty and dazzling and fascinating it’s hard to let the dream go. But looking past that it’s not the dream but what the dream represents, that’s linked to the flash and makes it so irresistible.

Dreams are fuzzy and free. Reality is more demanding. You want something, you can’t wait for it to fall into your lap. I.e, you go for it. You make your moves. You act. You work.

But what if you don’t know your passion? Even more, what if you have your passion, but you want it to stay a passion and not become, eww, work? If you still want to make enough money to keep body and soul together (plus a vacation on the side, a little sumpthin’-sumpthin’ to fall back on, and a few extras), what then? Continue reading Don’t Quite Know What To Do? Develop An Eye for Service